#44

Tis the day. I was born. But being born is something I’m used to…again and again. And with birth there is death; also quite familiar with death. I was never baptized. Kinda consider myself lucky — As I have gotten to choose who and what does the baptizing in my many new beginnings. Transitions. I never belonged to the church; also pretty lucky. Those that carry on confessing to a white man, well, I was on to that BS before you could say hallelujah. Anyway what a digression, I wanted to speak on what I’ve learned, mostly between 43 and 44. 

I’ve learned that things aren’t as scary as we make them out to be in our head. And now, yes, things are actually kinda scary and it’s not in our heads. It’s not a conspiracy. It’s truly a shake down and break down(personally and collectively) I have learned more love for humans across the aisle and continents. I looked into the eyes of many strangers on my travels and witnessed myself — Love returned. A belonging. I learned that I can do it!! I never set out to prove that — but it sure feels good to climb mountains both literally and not. Btw, I went down a mountain the other day with a man — came up solo. A woman and a Mountain; oh there’s so much more to this. I cannot explain the profound exhilaration at its peak, tears and laughter at once. I imagine it’s the collective feelings of a woman’s soul. Giving birth to something — another Being, her voice, her business, art // HERSELF.  

This year, for me, I’ve learned blood is not thicker than water. I’ve learned that not only Spirit has me/holds me/carries me, but my chosen family as well. As I write this it’s like cupid has a thousand arrows in me. I have been love struck by so many beautiful humans — on my many trips around the sun. But this year, now in the arc of our planet’s awakening, I am, to the moon, grateful for the container(a small set) of women on my stage. I am thankful for the deep inquiry, the conversation — the reciprocity. The healing. The “how do we charter these waters?” Together. 

“Tits up” (who knows where this comes from?) Oh and…..Life is Fucking short!

Holly